Love Yourself! Even If And When Others Don’t

“I can buy myself flowers

Write my name in the sand

Talk to myself for hours

Say things you don't understand

I can take myself dancing

And I can hold my own hand

Yeah, I can love me better than you can” 

- Miley Cyrus from Flowers

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Miley Cyrus’ Flowers has rocked the music world in the last several months. Her deep and sonorous voice has filled homes, cars and dancing floors of nations and territories. Flowers pieced into our sedentary life of seeking the love of others, reminding us of the need to start loving ourselves better. The fine piece of music - devoid of vulgarity - won two awards at the just concluded 66th Grammy. Miley’s live performance of the night has elicited rave reviews for its naturalness, vocals mastery and a simple and less distracting choreography. 

For a conservative music lover like me, I find myself drawn to Flowers, not so much to the pomp and pageantry surrounding the Grammy night  performance, but to its lyrics and to Miley’s authenticity. 

Flowers challenges our undue reliance on love and affirmation from others. We feel good when we feel loved. We are happy when others make us happy by the things they do or say to us. In essence, we tie our wellbeing to the apron strings of others’ attitudes and actions. This is a grave mistake as human disappointments and betrayals are inevitable. And as the love and affirmation from others wane, we tend to lose our balance and with it our happiness. This overbearing reliance on others for our wellbeing is derided by the Scriptures. 

”Thus says the Lord: “Cursed is the man who trusts in man And makes flesh his strength, Whose heart departs from the Lord. For he shall be like a shrub in the desert, And shall not see when good comes, But shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness, In a salt land which is not inhabited.“ Jeremiah‬ ‭17‬:‭5‬-‭6‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

The reason is that people will always be people - shifty as sand; unreliable at best; for “the heart [of man] is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; Who can know it?“ ‭‭Jeremiah‬ ‭17‬:‭9‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

The path to happiness begins with absolute trust in God. “For without Me you can do nothing!”(John 15:5) is the screaming headline from your Maker. To not recognize this is to court disaster. God is a missing link in Miley Cyrus’ Flowers: It shouldn’t be in your own life’s experience.

Then, you must have an unwavering faith in yourself. Miley suggests you appreciate yourself; buy yourself flowers. Motivate yourself to create indelible marks in the sand of time. Check what you are saying to yourself. Remember, as a man thinks in his heart so he is (Proverbs 23:7). So, be careful what you say to yourself, as your life invariably moves in the direction of your dominant thoughts. Love yourself - take yourself on a date, doing what you love doing, empowering yourself in the process. Hold your hand in an affectionate support. Never you forget, no one can love you better than yourself. Except God, of course.