My feet are sore.
My breath ebbs away.
I sit on the bed of depression;
My strength failing, my joy gone.
I tell my soul: ‘You have my permission to let sorrow into your hitherto guarded space.’
No more restraints.
To hell with drawing strength from the inner voice -
God’s still small voice that used to urge me on,
Saying, ‘Wait a little longer, dream some more, don’t give up the fight...till you win.’
Look, I am losing my mind.
And who will blame me for ending it here?
Life’s been so unfair.
More tears, less smiles.
The cock has refused to crow;
My dawn is locked up in the night,
Never to herald the day.
I crawl out of the bed to stare into the darkness.
The pitch darkness of the night is a metaphor for my soul.
But, wait, what’s this I am seeing?
The stars in the sky, shining brighter than I ever saw.
Not even the darkness could dim their light.
The stars defy the darkness;
Riding on the crest of the night to shine.
Look, what’s happening to me?
Is my mind betraying me?
Who are you to compare me with a star that defies the night?
How dare you ask me to start running again!
And what’s this smile, this new hope, this new strength?
Could it be true I am a star that defies the night?
I return to bed, beaming with hope.
I no longer fear the night; I fear me.
I hold the ace.
I define the night, and can defy it.
It is my call.
The night has all along been waiting for my command.
Rising from the bed, I say defiantly to the darkness, ‘I am a star!’
‘The darker you are, the brighter I shine. So, bring it on!’
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